an outing

Today marks the two week anniversary of the birth of my new knee. Like most newborns, it has its good moments and its not so good moments. Sometimes it is all smiley and happy and giving me lots of love, and at other times it is just downright cranky.


I have been very proud of myself for getting by on tylenol and ibuprofen. No one thought I could do it, but I am made of pretty tough stuff. Well, that is until I get to physical therapy and even there, until today I have been able to grit my teeth and bear it. Today was the breaking point. My physical therapist made me cry. It was spontaneous, couldn't stop myself, crying. I mean, I didn't wail or gnash my teeth, but I did cry. My sister, who was waiting for me heard it and started to jump up and deck someone. Thank goodness she restrained herself. 


Physical therapy after knee replacement is never fun, but they usually tell you to take a narcotic pain killer an hour before the session. As I can't take narcotic pain killers, I am going in there with my gloves off, so to speak. So, I will be working really hard at home over the next three days to get my knee to bend more. That way I can cry in the privacy of my own room.


My sister and I decided I definitely needed an outing and decided to have lunch out. (my favorite thing to do)

Oh yum, Saul Goods here we come.  I really am on my way. I'm just a little slowed down because of the walker.


Yes please, I'll have the grilled tuna salad wrap with seasoned fries.

Ahhhh!!!! I am feeling like a human being again, but I think this has been a pretty full day and I hear a nap calling my name.

 

a Memorial Day tribute

my dad as a young businessman

 Today is Memorial Day and as on all Memorial Days, I think of my late father. George Reece Holloway was a lieutenant and later promoted to a captain in the United States Air Force in WWII. He served his country valiantly. The P-38 plane he was piloting was shot down on June 20, 1944. He was sent to a German POW camp at Stalag Luft I where he was kept until liberated by the American forces. He was called up again during the Korean War and with his young family (I was a baby) went to Texas to train other pilots.

From P-38 Ligtning losses June, 1944

"P-38 J 42-67963. 370th Fighter Group. (Plane shot down at 17H30 -German time- near La Puthenaye, N.W. of Conches. Pilot, Lt George R. HOLLOWAY, is captured a few moments later at Grosley and sent to Chartres interrogation center)." 


My dad as a young officer.

Sixteen years ago, my father passed away after a long battle with Multiple Sclerosis. He died with the same bravery and dignity that he had when serving his country.

Landing of the first P-38 on the mainland near Ste Mère l'Eglise (US National Archives).

photo via Lightning losses

So today. a special thanks to all the men and women who have protected our country.

Passing Over

"I'm coming to join you, Elizabeth"..... and no, I am not talking about Fred Sanford's wife, Elizabeth. I'm talking about my grandmother who passed over 30 years ago. You see, you can now add percocet to the growing list of medications I will no longer allow to pass my lips anytime in the near or far future. It has now been 7 days since my surgery and up until this afternoon, I thought I was going to be joining my grandmother and other wonderful relatives in that better place. I kept telling everyone that I was dying and they didn't believe me, although my mother said I definitely wasn't my usual charming self  (well she didn't exactly use those words.) 

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I called up the lovely nurse at my doctor's office this morning and told her I thought maybe I shouldn't be taking percocet, because I felt like I was going to have to call the undertaker. In her ever so calm manner she said "what do you mean?"  Well, I think I mean that I feel like I am dying. "Well did you take it in the hospital?"  Um, I have no recollection of being in the hospital. "What do you mean you have no recollection of being in the hospital?".......I mean I HAVE NO RECOLLECTION OF BEING IN THE HOSPITAL!!!!!! I assume from the multi colored bruises that are covering my entire leg, the huge ugly scar on my knee, and the fact I have no mobility in my knee, that I underwent some type of procedure that involved a hospital stay. I see, she said, "let me call the doctor". The nurse called the doctor and the doctor said...no more monkeys...whoops, I'm still a tad bit loopy. He said he thought I should go and see my regular doctor. Talk about passing the buck. Um, excuse me, but by the time I get an appointment to see my regular doctor and then walk the two miles back to her office with my walker, I will not only have passed over, but they will have sent me back. 

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My mother piped in here, in her sweet little grandmother voice, and said maybe they should have known when it took them almost two hours to wake you up after surgery that you can't tolerate much medication. HUH????? Well, in all fairness, they did seem to panic right when they were getting ready to roll me into the operating room and the anesthesiologist decided to look at my medical records and noticed that I had peripheral neuropathy. You know, he said, there is a slight chance that this could cause your leg to become numb and you might not get over it. HUH??? That's when my little 4 foot 10 inch mother jumped up and said you are not giving that to her. I did start to panic here somewhat, and that is when they began to throw everything but the kitchen sink at me. Sedative for the stress they were causing me, benadryl for the hives that broke out all over my face.........zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.


So that was really my last coherent thought for the last seven days (yes I know I wrote a blog post two days ago, but who knows if I was actually present.) Now, though, I did the smart thing and took myself off percocet. HALLELEUJAH!!!!! I think there is a possibility the girl might live to see another day. 


Oh, and that day includes physical therapy. You don't even want to know how that sweet little girl can bring me to tears. 


BTW, I have 637 pages of emails I haven't answered, so if you haven't heard from me, that could be the reason.

 

mama said....

there'll be days like this, there'll be days like this my mama said.......

No matter what mama said, nothing prepared me for the post operative pain of total knee replacement.  So let me catch you up to date. I had the surgery Thursday morning. Apparently they over medicated me somewhat and had a hard time getting me to wake up in the recovery room. No big deal, because I'm here to tell you I would have been fine with sleeping a couple of weeks. The two wonderful days I spent in the hospital went by in a drug induced blurry haze. A few hours after surgery some lovely young girl with two lovely young knees came into my room and said. You're doing great. Now we are going to get you to stand on your new knee. HUH?????

 Okay, we all know that I am too nice to say you're mean, go away, so I just did what she asked and stood, took two steps sideways, and vowed to never walk again as long as I live. 


Saturday I was sent home with instructions to report to physical therapy on Wednesday. Coming home was fun. There was my wonderful bed waiting for me at the top of a flight of stairs. 

I don't quite remember my stairs being so long, in the past, but there must be angels waiting to hold my hands when I get to the top. No such luck. Just my sister, with a walker.


Yesterday, I wasn't feeling too well, so I decided to take my temp.

and what were the post op rules about temps? shuffle, shuffle, shuffle of papers. Any temp over 100.4 means a return trip to the hospital, and what did mine say? 100.6 The next question was how was I going to get back down those stairs. There definitely were not any angels waiting to carry me down, so I did the next best thing and dialed 911. I mean isn't it every woman's dream to at some point be carried out on a throne by three good looking men.


In reality, when the paramedics came, they looked at me and looked at the stairs and said "How'd you ever get up these stairs?" I don't know, but let's have a little respect for the sick woman here!


Six hours later, after being poked, prodded, x-rayed, and ultra sounded, the doctors declared me to have....... a post operative fever. Oh, and now you get to go back home and get back up those stairs. No problem. It's the witching hour of midnight. I'll just fly right on up on my broomstick. 


So today I get to take my first real shower. I feel sure everyone who has to deal with me will be thrilled by that, and tomorrow I get to go for


Chinese Torture

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I mean physical therapy. I'll let you know how it goes, but if you are within a 3000 mile radius of me, you'll probably hear.

 

It's blooming

I am so excited that the daylily is blooming. Last year it didn't have any blooms all summer. 

Just thought I would do a quick share.

They just called to say I have to be at the hospital at 6:30 am. Yikes. I hope I'm awake. I still have a lot to do today so this is definitely a short post. 


See you next week.

 

I am......

many things.  

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For most of my life I allowed myself to believe that I was what other people told me I was. Those beliefs held me back. We are none of us what other people say we are. We are what we believe we are. 


When I went to graduate school in my 40s, my eyes were opened. Unfortunately, they were opened for other people. I didn't apply the principles I learned to myself. So while I was busy helping others become enlightened, happier, better people, I was still seeing myself in terms of what other people told me I was. I was living a life that other people told me I should live. It didn't work.


No more.

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I really love being me and I am now busy manifesting my dreams.

Thursday I am having knee replacement surgery. I used to believe that because I lost my health insurance, I would have to live with the pain of my two cranky knees. Then I started to believe that I would get the surgery and things began to fall into place. One will be done and I believe the other will get done, too.


We can never be truly happy by trying to be someone that others want us to be. 

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I am looking forward to the rest of my life, just being me and I love that I have gotten to know you, because I love who you are.

 

shopping on monday

I loved starting my Monday with this. This will be a very busy week for me as I have to spend the next three days getting ready for my surgery on Thursday. I am very excited and nervous about it at the same time and I have a lot to do before Thursday gets here.  I did want to start my day by relaxing with a cup of decaf green tea and browsing Etsy, so that is exactly what I did. 


I hope you enjoy what I found.


Please click on the price below the photo to see the item on Etsy.


vegan coffee shampoo.

$6

two vintage french tea towels

approx. $39.67

white lace pottery serving set

$25

made in france messenger bag

$129.74

journal with antique cabinet card cover

$25

little white sheep in wool

$40

 

Letter From Mother To A Daughter

Mother's Day is Sunday and I found this wonderful letter and thought I would share it. For those of us who have elderly mothers and are aging ourselves, I thought this was especially poignant. 


Letter from a Mother to a Daughter


"My dear girl, the day you see I’m getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I’m going through. If when we talk, I repeat the same thing a thousand times, don’t interrupt to say: “You said the same thing a minute ago”... Just listen, please. Try to remember the times when you were little and I would read the same story night after night until you would fall asleep. When I don’t want to take a bath, don’t be mad and don’t embarrass me. Remember when I had to run after you making excuses and trying to get you to take a shower when you were just a girl? When you see how ignorant I am when it comes to new technology, give me the time to learn and don’t look at me that way... remember, honey, I patiently taught you how to do many things like eating appropriately, getting dressed, combing your hair and dealing with life’s issues every day... the day you see I’m getting old, I ask you to please be patient, but most of all, try to understand what I’m going through. If I ocasionally lose track of what we’re talking about, give me the time to remember, and if I can’t, don’t be nervous, impatient or arrogant. Just know in your heart that the most important thing for me is to be with you. And when my old, tired legs don’t let me move as quickly as before, give me your hand the same way that I offered mine to you when you first walked. When those days come, don’t feel sad... just be with me, and understand me while I get to the end of my life with love. I’ll cherish and thank you for the gift of time and joy we shared. With a big smile and the huge love I’ve always had for you, I just want to say, I love you... my darling daughter."


From Spring Air

here are some photos of my daughters when they were young and now as beautiful women.

Katy with her niece and my granddaughter, Sidney.

and Cary, the mother of my two and soon to be three grandchildren.

My mom at age 16

My mom now at age 87

She is still beautiful and full of life.


I want to wish all of you, who are mothers, a happy Mother's Day. I am so blessed to be a daughter, a mother, and a grandmother.

 

just sittin' for a spell

Today has been one of those perfect days. So after running all my errands this morning I just sat outside on the patio and enjoyed the beautiful afternoon. 

The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and the temps were in the upper 60s. Perfection.

There were a few fluffy clouds hanging around. The kind that make you imagine the pictures they are forming.


The daylily has lots of buds, but the flowers aren't out yet. I hope it is getting enough sun.

Mr. Blackbird stopped by to scold me. 

Apparently I had the nerve to let the feeders run out of seed. 

So much for the lazy afternoon. I seem to have forgotten my duties.

 

al fresco dining

It's that time of year again when people everywhere are starting to fire up the grill and head outside to eat. Do you have a favorite place for eating outdoors? Do you even like eating outdoors? My mother hates it. She doesn't like the bugs or the heat. I on the other hand love it. An outdoor fan gets rid of both the bugs and the heat.

An old fashioned picnic table painted white and sitting next to a garden shed looks like a nice place.

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How about an eclectic mix of rustic and elegant for nighttime dining.

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Outdoor dining on the porch, surrounded by potted flowers.

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I would love to open that garden gate and share a meal here.

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I love this space, but not sure how I feel about dining on a table covered with grass.

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and then there is always the fun of hopping on your bike

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and pedaling off for a good old fashioned picnic.

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